To Gay or Not to Gay? That is the Question

Recently someone who is one of my Facebook friends, posted an innocent little blurb saying that he didn't understand why men turn gay, and that with all of the women in the world to choose from he just couldn't understand why two men with hairy legs and two dicks would want  to lay in the bed together.  I say innocent, because I am quite sure that he meant no harm in his statement, and I know that perhaps he has not been exposed to divergent thought and opinions concerning the subject matter.  But the bigger issue with his statement, is that some people take this as an opportunity to showcase their hatred towards gays and lesbians, and this time was no different.

So the Colored Man could not let a chance go by to offer some enlightenment and the chance to encourage him to do some serious thought about gays and lesbians, and not to rely on locker room banter to form his opinions.  I countered back that people are born gay, just like people are born straight, and that I didn't think that anyone would chose to be gay, when you look at all of the hatred, violence, and disdain that gay people are subjected to.

"I agree brother! I do not think when a child is born they know at the age of 0-6 months that they are gay. That is something that they see or are taught. All in all, at the end of the day its an abomination to God. I am not trying to offend anyone, just not compromising with the enemy. God Speed!!! No sin is greater than the next, just calling a spade a spade!"  This was the response that came in immediately after my post.  Needless to say, the Colored Man just could not resist a good fight and thus began a back and forth exchange, that eventually caused the original poster to remove his post.

I firmly believe that each of us is entitled to our opinions about various issues.  After all, opinions are like assholes.....everybody has one.  But do not approach me with opinions and attitudes that are based on biblical words, when I know that the Bible has been used for centuries as a tool against people, and to justify negative attitudes and behavior.  Bring me information and opinions that are based on fact and scholarly research, not hate and bigotry that you gleaned from some screaming preacher on Sunday morning or from your home and environment.

Slavery in America was justified with quotes from the Bible.  Women being beaten by their husbands was justified with quotes from the Bible.  Gays and lesbians are beaten and killed daily because someone uses a Bible verse to justify their hatred.  All kinds of shit goes on because someone uses a Bible verse to say that it's okay.  When does the madness stop?

Let's look at her assinine statement.  First of all a baby doesn't know anything except when it's time to eat, and when it's time to sleep.  Is she saying that gay people are pedophiles who have sex with babies?  If so, the myth has been debunked long ago. So the absurdity of her statement is beyond belief.  Is this coming from someone who is college-educated, and supposedly working to obtain a PhD?  Her second sentence is just as crazy as the first.  Are there groups of gays and lesbians who work for some company that go around in a van and teach children how to have same-sex sex?  Or perhaps there are summer camps that specialize in teaching children how to be gay - the first day of camp young boys are given hands-on opportunities to learn how to suck a dick properly, and the girls are taught how to perform cunnilingus.  And of course they are given badges when they master each sex act, and told to go home and practice their newly learned skills as often as possible.  One question that I can't resist asking is, are heterosexual children taught how to have heterosexual sex, or is this just a special program for gay children?  Do not step to the Colored Man with such country, backwoods ignorance!!

Her references to the "enemy" are what all Bible-thumpers resort to when they seek to impose their non-sensical rhetoric.  If you don't agree with them, then you automatically become the "enemy."  In other words, we are at war, and when at war, enemies are killed, ie....gay people and their supporters.

Unfortunately, the African-American church has become one of the most homophobic, mysoginistic places in America.  Go to any church on a Sunday, and you will hear some of the most vile, hateful statements imaginable coming from the pulpit.  Make a homophobic statement during service, and the congregation just goes wild, as if they were at a rock concert and the headliner just hit the stage.  One of the pastors at my late mother's church once made the statement "that he didn't want any women up in his pulpit because they were nasty with their blood dripping".  Imagine the nerve and balls to say that, when 80% of your congregation is female, and they basically pay your salary.  Even worse is said about gays and lesbians.  Couldn't and shouldn't that time used to promote hate and intolerance be used to open up some food pantries, or offer after-school tutoring to neighborhood students, or something that uplifts rather than downgrades?  But that takes real effort, focus and work, while hate-filled words only take a tongue, teeth and a pair of lips.

As African-Americans we should be acutely aware of how discrimination and hatred work against people, or have we forgotten from whence we came?  As a race we have been denied, killed, hung, raped, tortured, whipped, jailed, beaten.  It seems that these same atrocities are okay for gay people, because after all, they choose to be gay, and our hate towards them is supported by the Bible.

Michael Eric Dyson, the noted scholar once served on a panel discussion during Tavis Smiley's now-defunct "State of Black America" conference.  The subject for that particular year's conference was the Black church, and this particular panel was focusing on women and gays and lesbians in the Black church.  Dr. Dyson who is part of the new order of black intelligentsia, is very outspoken, and one comment that he made has stuck with me.  He said," I can appreciate the rappers who call women bitches and other deragatory terms, because you know exactly where they are coming from, while in the Black church they don't call women names, they just treat them like bitches and whores."  How many gay men sit in church Sunday after Sunday, plunking on a piano or pumping an organ, and listen to speech after speech calling them abhorrent and an abomination?  All of this makes the Colored Man sick to his stomach.

If my PhD seeking friend had taken an opportunity to educate herself about gay and lesbian issues, she would find that homosexuality has been in cultures across the spectrum.  Native-Americans valued their fellow tribe-members who were gay, and considered them to have both "spirits" within them, and were revered in the culture.  Of course this all changed when the Great White Father came along, and forced his European value system on them.  The same thing can be seen in the Hispanic culture, until European colonization and the forceful conversion to Catholicism.  Most people may not be aware of this, but most African's brought to America on slave ships were Muslim.  This can be evidenced if you visit some of the South Carolina and Georgia islands, where you will see cemetery symbols and church practices directly connected to the Islamic faith.  African-American women are well-known for their "church hats," which is an interpretation of the Islamic practice of a woman keeping her hair covered when in public.  We have followed the Judeo-Christian religions without knowing what our own religious heritage is, and even worse, not taking the time to investigate and research our heritage.

In another post, my "thumper" said that she has gay friends, but they keep that part of themselves away from her.  Haven't we heard this before....."I have black friends" so I am not a racist.  I have gay friends, so I am not homophobic, but my gay friends just can't discuss their relationships with me, or invite me to a gay party or club.  They have to keep that stuff away from me.  Talk about being a hypocrite, this beats the band.  Why can't we all just accept people for who and what they are, and not but parameters on our relationships with them?  Thumper wants to be this high and holy persona, but she forgets that God loves her unconditionally, and who is she to love with conditions and barriers?, when God himself never mentioned one single word against homosexuality?

The whole back-and-forth ended with her calling me a dog and telling me that she no longer wanted to communicate with me, and that she would return the wedding present that I gave her, since I happened to mention that her etiquette was lacking, and that I received no type of thank you for my gift.  She said that I was being petty about the thank-you card, but petty will help me to purchase a flat-screen television!!!  So bring it on baby.  Just leave all of your hate and venom at the door.

Well, the Colored Man could go on and on about this, but I did learn a few things.  Sometimes it's best to just let ignorance speak for itself; sometimes a college education doesn't mean that a person is learned and able to present a legitimate argument; and that sometimes you just have to speak out and confront bigotry and hatred head-on, whether it's coming from friend, family or foe.

Last Sunday I went to see a video-feed of the Broadway musical Fela, which is about the life and times of Fela Keti, the Nigerian singer/musician and political activist.  One of the last lines from him in the musical asks the question, "Whose coffin are you willing to carry?"

The Colored Man asks you the same question.

The Sphinx Awakens

An Egyptian Sphinx cat

Hello folks!!!  So much has been going on in the world that the Colored Man is dumbfounded, well almost, at least.  Where do I begin.........

It seems that the sphinx has risen in Egypt.  The people are tired of being tired, and decided to rise up and say, "no more."  Last week when it all began, I checked out Al Jazeera on-line.  I was very surprised at the English version - this is not the syrupy news program that we Americans are used to.  The reporters ask hard questions, and have no problem letting people know that they did not answer the questions posed.  I also attempted to contact an Egyptian living in the United States, so that I could get a better understanding of how conditions are for Egyptians, but no one responded, however, I have had hits on the blog from Saudi Arabia, Tunisia, and Turkey, so perhaps someone from one of those countries will contact me.  I hope so.

One thing that the Colored Man has noticed about the protestors in Egypt, is that many of them look very similar to people that the Colored Man knows here in the States.  Familiar skin tones, hair textures, full lips and noses.  In relation, I have noticed that the people in power are lighter skinned Egyptians, and seem to have a much looser, straighter hair texture, and thinner lips and noses.  Hosni Mubarak's daughter-in-law, Khadija-Mona looks sun-kissed, blonde European.  His son Gamal looks Latin-heartthrob, while his other son, Ala'a is a dead-ringer for Jon Hamm from the televison show, Mad Men.  Is it just me?  Have you noticed the same thing?  Today, while leaving work, I heard a story on National Public Radio, that confirmed my suspicions.  It seems that the darker Egyptian tribes have been relegated to second-class citizenry.  But as we all know, things in Egypt have changed.

Hosni Mubarek has resigned and is esconsed in his seaside villa in Sharm El-Sheikh, while his billions stashed in Swiss bank accounts have been frozen.  So I guess he will have to do with his million dollar pocket change.  Rumors are swirling that he has suffered a stroke, but one thing is for sure.  He is no longer president of the Republic of Egypt.  The Colored Man is truly amazed that these people think that they can pass power down to their offspring, similar to an heirloom chair or table.  They view their homelands as places of business, whose sole purpose is to make themselves, their family members and trusted friends rich.  Damn the citizenry, many who are literally starving to death.

America has always portrayed itself as the beacon of freedom and democracy around the world.  But the beacon seems to be dim when it comes to these tyrannical leaders in the Middle East.  America seems to be blinded by the sand, and turns a blind eye towards the atrocities that are committed.  In fact, these atrocities against people are encouraged - Egypt was the go-to country for getting information by any means necessary from kidnapped people who had suspected ties to Islamic terrorists.  But the terror was also allowed due to Egypt's hands-off relationship with Israel.  But will this continue, now that Mubarak has gone?  Perhaps the hens are coming home to roost, as Reverend Jeremiah Wright put it.

Will Jordan continue to imprison citizens who speak badly of the royal family?  Will Saudi Arabia continue to entertain its citizens with public beheadings, and the stoning of women?, will they work on labor issues in a country that is wealthy beyond measure?, but where 44% of its college-educated men are unemployed, and 88% of its college-educated women are unemployed.  Some of the autocrats have tried to get a jump-start before things get out of hand, and have made some limited reforms, but so much more needs to be done.

The prologue of this play has been thrilling, and Act I promises to be just as exciting.  The sphinx has risen, and he is tired to laying around.  The Colored Man predicts that this theatrical production will be a traveling show, sure to hit many desert stages.